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Here On Earth
CLIP IN
01:05:40
CLIP OUT
01:08:35

SUMMARY

The next morning, Kelley and Samantha wake up together at Morse Mansion. Samantha goes downstairs to make breakfast while dancing around with no pants on, until she is interrupted up Kelley's father and his new girlfriend.

Samantha makes small talk with Mr. Morse's girlfriend while Kelley fights with his father. Despite Kelley's protests, Mr. Morse orders his son to return to Putnam and complete his probation so he can start early at Princeton.

ANALYSIS

As exciting as it seems to engage in sex as a teenager, anyone who has actually done so can attest to the generally awkward, groping, embarrassed nature of these early encounters. But if the viewer had any lingering doubts that Kelley and Samantha are compatible as lovers, the sight of their perfectly posed, tastefully covered bodies the next morning indicates that their lovemaking went smooth and easily. Alternatively, perhaps Morse Mansion is so fancy, it includes special staff to come in silently and arrange each bed's occupants to look like the cover of a romance novel and wax Kelley's chest while he sleeps.

In any case, at least a small degree of awkwardness remains between them, as indicated when Samantha wakes up and sees Kelley's plastic mug staring back at her; Samantha's need to fill the silence with the first thing that comes into her head results in the line, "I wonder what the world record is for staying in bed." If there is a world record for the longest time spent in bed, it probably belongs to someone who weighs 600 pounds or has a crippling disease. In the case of the latter, at least fate will ultimately give Samantha a chance to break that record twice in one week.

At this point, however, Samantha is the very portrait of healthy vibrance. After volunteering to make breakfast (presumably to escape the ordeal of "morning after" interactions with Kelley) Samantha demonstrates that her hearing is keen enough to hear the actual movie, as she dances around to a song playing on the soundtrack. Initially, it seems she is capable of extra-sensory perception as well, as she totally knows her way around a strange kitchen, until we realize that Samantha must be familiar with this set because it was also used as the Arnolds' kitchen.

Samantha's discovery by Mr. Morse and his female companion inspires the only (actually) good line in the movie:

Samantha [unaware who is behind her]: I thought I told you to wait in bed.
Mr. Morse: I had a feeling it might get a little crowded.

Mr. Morse appears to be the only character in the film with a little perspective, despite the fact that he is clearly intended to be an antagonistic figure. According to Kelley, his father is exerting too much control over his life and refuses to validate his relationship with Samantha. In fact, Mr. Morse should be commended for refusing to let his son flake on his probation despite Kelley's moaning about going back to school, not to mention his father's love life:

Kelley: I don't believe you'd bring a woman into mom's house!
Mr. Morse: Don't you even THINK about turning this around on me.

Indeed, Mr. Morse's above response leads us to conclude that he is actually slow rolling Here On Earth from inside the movie. Additionally, Kelley's attempt at self-determination ("It's my life!") is somewhat undermined by the fact that he could face jail time for breaking probation, and until Mable's Table is reopened for business, Kelley's life truly belongs to Judge Maddick.


JUDGE MADDICK SAYS...
"Samantha better be careful dancing around that stove! If she burns down that mansion, you know I'll make her rebuild it herself!"

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© The Slow Roll 2007